Things My Mother Taught Me is a play about a young couple moving into their first apartment and all the surprises and stresses that come with such a venture. As if a new city, a stubborn superintendent, and an oversized chair stuck in the doorway aren’t enough, the couple’s parents show up to surprise their children and lend a helping hand, with various and dubious definitions of “helping.”
This show was originally cast in 2020, but never rehearsed or performed due to the pandemic. We are presenting the play this season with the originally-selected cast, but one role has since opened up.
The role of Max Mirowski, the building’s obstinate but friendly super, was originally written to be a Polish man, but we are interested in casting the character as any gender and as an immigrant of any nationality. We will consider any actor over the age of 30. A non-American, non-British accent is a must.
To audition for this role, please send a video of yourself and a scene partner performing the following dialogue to birdie.jones@theatrehsv.org by February 1, 2022. Please note that this role is on a volunteer basis.
Rehearsals will begin in March at our rehearsal space at 500 Plummer Rd. in Huntsville Alabama and performances will be on May 6-8 and 12-14 at the Von Braun Center Playhouse. If you have any questions, please email the Production Manager Birdie Jones at the above email.
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(OLIVIA is trying to pull a chair through the door of her new apartment, but it is stuck in the doorframe and will not budge.
MAX MIROWSKI, the building super, appears in the doorway behind the chair.)
MAX. (to the chair, clucks) Uh-oh.
OLIVIA. (sits up) I'm sorry - who are -
MAX. Max. Mirowski. Building Super. Nice to meet you.
OLIVIA. Oh! (She stands.) Hi! Nice to meet you too.
MAX. You got a problem here, yes?
OLIVIA. Oh, well. Yeah. The chair seems to be stuck.
MAX. Yeah. Uh-oh. (beat) Well. Happy Move-In! (He turns to leave.)
OLIVIA. Oh – uh - Max? Do you - do you think you could help me at all with -?
MAX. (perfect English) I'm sorry. My English is not so good. I don't understand what you're saying.
OLIVIA. I see.
MAX. Here's a good thing to remember, new tenant: if it's not a problem with building, it's not my problem.
OLIVIA. So - you don't think a chair stuck in the door is a problem with the building?
MAX. No. It's a problem with your chair. Should be smaller.
OLIVIA. Great. Thanks.
MAX. You are welcome! Oh, and, is that your truck downstairs? With the gangly man unloading the things?
OLIVIA. Oh! Yes. That's us –
MAX. Uh-oh.
OLIVIA. Uh-oh? What do you mean, uh-oh?
MAX. In this neighborhood, maybe you don't leave so many things on the sidewalk if you don't want someone to walk away with them very fast.